As a special needs parent there are some things that happen way too often that can instantly tick you off!! It can be a phrase that you hear, stares that you get or even a certain tone someone uses to speak to your child.
I know people don’t mean any harm by what they say or do…well most people anyway…but when you have dealt with these same things on a weekly or even daily basis for years they get really old.
So let me list a few for you:
1. My son is not a baby!!
I get it…I really do!! He’s a little guy! Very little! But he’s NOT a baby! It always baffles me when people talk to him with the tone and pitch they would use for a 6 month old!! Or when they are repetitive. For example “He has a great smile. Yes you do you have a great smile don’t you?” What is that?! He’s got more than a great smile…although it is pretty freaking awesome…he doesn’t want to hear you go on and on about it. Did you notice that smile has three permanent teeth in it. Last I checked babies don’t have big teeth!!! Why don’t you ask him about school, or sports or his girlfriend then you will see a great smile!
2. “I’m so sorry”
What the what?! Again I get it! Sometimes people just don’t know what to say…but really? Saying “I’m so sorry” about my child sendsmy blood rolling!! What exactly are you sorry for? The fact that he’s in a chair but yet goes everywhere and does everything? The fact that he can’t stand or run but plays baseball? The fact that he’s nonverbal but we have so many conversations? You saying that to my child is no different than me saying “Oh little Susie has freckles…I’m so sorry!” or “I saw your son has brown hair…I’m so sorry!” So the next time you are faced with this and your natural response is “I’m sorry” maybe try “how is he doing?” Instead because I’d much rather gloat about how awesome he is rather than give you my fake smile while imagining myself throat punching you 😁
<<< strong>When people talk to me and not him.<<<<<<<<<<
n! Can he talk? No but he can hear and he can understand and he wants to interact. If he can't answer I will help him by making a yes or no question but talk to him. People ask me questions like he's not even sitting there…ask him!!
<<< strong>”Is he going to eat?”<<<<<<<<<<
lot at restaurants and it drives me crazy! The waitress/waiter comes to take our drink order and they almost always skip over Grant. I always have to stop them and tell them what he wants. Then they come to take our food order and way more than I should I hear "Is he going to eat?" Nah I though we'd sit and let him starve while we all eat!! YES HE'S GOING TO EAT!!
<<< strong>”Awe someone is tired”<<<<<<<<<<
ause I don't see any tired kiddos here!! Trust me come to my house at bedtime and you will still see no sleepy kiddos!! I don't hear this one as much anymore because he's getting much stronger in his neck. It usually happens at the grocery store when he's in his GoTo Seat or I'm carrying him. His muscles fatigue sometimes from holding that big ole brain up and he drops his head. Does that mean he's tired? Umm no that means he's working hard!! I've even had people say "look at that he's sleeping" he looks up at them and then looks around like who? Silly boy!!
top my list there but could go on! I've often joked that I'm going to teach him to flip the bird when things like these happen!! Or make a button on his device that says "I'm not a freaking baby!" How funny would it be for him to say that when someone is talking to him in that obnoxious voice? I think it would be priceless!
Moral of the story: just because someone doesn't "look" a certain way or has a disability doesn't give you the right to take away what they do have with your ignorance!
Have a blessed day!